October 7, 2000-Rob Lowe
*Jim Lehrer (CHP) moderates Al Gore (DAH) vs. George W. Bush (WIF) debate
-Monday Night Football- Dennis Miller (JIF) gets obscure during pregame
-Pros & Cons- vigilante snoops Scooby & Shaggy (host) defend their methods
-(WIF) & (MOS) have an awkward blind date at an airport bar
-perfectionist Stone Phillips (host) records intros for Dateline NBC
October 14, 2000-Kate Hudson
*in second debate, Al Gore (DAH) & George W. Bush (WIF) find common ground
-(host)’s televised Spring Break wildness embarrasses her parents (WIF) & (MOS)
-Inside The Actors Studio- Drew Barrymore (host) recalls her magical career
-Denise (RAD) & Sully (JIF) hang in the basement of his sister (host)
-Woodrow (TRM) brings host to the sewer to pitch his movie script idea
-Meet The Press- Tim Russert (DAH) gives Hillary Clinton (ANG) a hard time
-Rabun To Shuri- Japanese sitcom with (MAR) & (host) mirrors Laverne & Shirley
October 21, 2000-Dana Carvey
*undecided voters & George Bush (DAC) question debaters Al Gore (DAH) & George W. Bush (WIF)
-Margaret Jo (ANG) & Terry (MOS) welcome a teacher (DAC) hassled by gang activity
-Church Chat- Hillary Clinton (ANG), Anne Heche (CHK) & Eminem (CHP) are interviewed
-George (DAC) tries to give George W. (WIF) Bush advice during a hunting trip
-2000 VH-1 Vogue Fashion Awards- stars celebrate style achievements
-Ching Change (DAC) receives financing for his Broadway play about chickens
November 4, 2000-Charlize Theron
*A Glimpse of Our Possible Future- chaotic president George W. Bush (WIF) addresses the nation
-Total Request Live- Gemini's Twin (ANG) & (MAR) added (host) for her looks
-Goth Talk- Azrael (CHK) & Circe (MOS) take Marla (host) & Cody's (HOS) Blair Witch Tour
-jealous Joe DiMaggio (JIF) guards wife Marilyn Monroe (host) on movie set
-Bedtime Stories- sex therapy patient (host) is aroused by Mr. Peepers (CHK)
-Paul Simon [real] watches Kyle (CHK) & Sean (CHP) DeMarco interpret his songs through dance
-The Coconut Bangers Ball- Robert Goulet (WIF) covers rap songs on album
-Buena Vista Social Club members get friendly with audience member (host)
November 11, 2000-Calista Flockhart
*odd couple George W. Bush (WIF) & Al Gore (DAH) will share the presidency
-at a Democratic rally, Marty (WIF) & Bobbi (ANG) perform a political medley
-a fellow tech support worker (host) gives Nick Burns (JIF) his first kiss
-The Crocodile Hunter- Steve (CHK) & Terri (host) Irwin are attacked
-middle-aged barflies' (MOS) & (host) advances creep out (JEM) & (JIF)
-Dan Rather (DAH) uses loony expressions while predicting NBA winners
November 18, 2000-Tom Green
*Al Gore (DAH) puts George W. Bush's (WIF) acceptance speech on hold
-bald eagle (WIF) searches for her baby (host) in the Studio 8H balcony
-Rap Street- Grand Master Rap (JEM) & Kid Shazaam (HOS) approve of (host)'s rhymes
-Hardball- Chris Matthews (DAH) lets Katherine Harris (ANG) gloat
-Dog Show- wizard's (host) pig squeals & casts a spell of invisibility
-Oprah (MAR)- Dr. Phil McGraw (WIF) gives nonsensical marriage advice
-Storytellers- Air Supply vocalists (CHK) & (WIF) reminisce & make out
December 9, 2000-Val Kilmer
*Al Gore (DAH) seeks election compensation through personal injury lawyer (CHK)
-Behind The Music- in Heaven, Jim Morrison (host) forms a supergroup
-Palm Beach- election drama of George W. Bush (WIF) & Al Gore (DAH) in soap opera
-Veronica & Co.- supermodel (MOS) leads unfocussed panel discussion
-aging commercial jet pilot Iceman (host) is living in the past
-Margaret Healey (MOS) finds a partner in accent-loving blind date (host)
-horn-playing brothers (CHP) & (WIF) do recoding session for Burt Bacharach (host)
December 16, 2000-Lucy Liu
*at Chi-Chi's, George W. Bush (WIF) & Al Gore (DAH) attempt reconciliation
-the tech stock plunge hurts priceline.com spokesman William Shatner (DAH)
-Total Request Live- Gemini's Twin (ANG) & (MAR) added (host) because she has a minivan
-Celebrity Jeopardy!- Robin Williams (JIF), Catherine ZJ (host), Sean Connery (DAH) are inept
-Pretty Living- joyologist Helen's (MOS) new fling is a female lumberjack (host)
-Jarret's (JIF) Room- dorm-based webcast is a window into youth culture
-angel (MOS) & other Christmas ornaments worry about making it to the tree
-Murder In The Make-Believe Ballroom- more rap from Robert Goulet (WIF)
January 13, 2001-Charlie Sheen
*vice president Dick Cheney (DAH) checks his pulse & talks to the rich
-Iron Chef- American bachelor (host) & Morimoto (HOS) cook shark heads
-Eric Dickerson (TRM) interviews sports stars and broadcasters in NFL Pregame Special
-at an MLK Day assembly, Marty (WIF) & Bobbi (ANG) perform a civil rights medley
-Patsy Marsh (MOS) overacts on the set of The Young & The Restless
-(RAD) is surprised to give birth to 37 year-old Ted Brogan (WIF)
-T.G.I. Friday's (WIF) obnoxious waiter son (CHK) has job security
-host & Heidi Fleiss (RAD) do a prostitution-themed Who's On First routine
January 20, 2001-Mena Suvari
* on inauguration night, smug Bill Clinton (DAH) says "suck on it"
-impractical airport security guard Jackie (MAR) annoys passengers
-Janet Reno's (WIF) Dance Party- Janet Reno [real] crashes final episode
-Rap Street- Aaron Carter (host) is applauded for his G-rated rhymes
-Wake Up Little Suzie- movie features (TRM)'s love for comatose (host)
-Veronica & Co.- (MOS)’s panelists include boyfriend (WIF) & young model (host)
-Kyle (CHK) & Sean (CHP) DeMarco win over Lenny Kravitz [real] with their take on his songs
February 10, 2001-Jennifer Lopez
*while TRM fills in as George W. Bush, WIF can't get over host's booty
-Mango (CHK) & host develop a rivalry after he becomes a recording star
-Cribs- Gemini's Twin (ANG) & (MAR) & new member (host) showoff their crappy apartment
-Fly Girls (JEM) (TRM) (RAD) want to work with host again
-Good Morning Bronx- district residents broadcast the local news
-oblivious Jeannie Darcy (MOS) does inappropriate material at a nursing home gig
-at a WWII USO show, (host) damages morale by singing pro-German songs
February 17, 2001-Sean Hayes
*George W. Bush (WIF) says the Iraq strike was meant to help Bill Clinton
-Margaret Jo (ANG) & Terry (MOS) trip out after eating (host)’s portabello mushrooms
-Hardball- Chris Matthews (DAH) exaggerates wake of Clinton pardon scandal
-at Jeffrey's, fashion-hip clerks (JIF) & (host) insult customers' style
-Hello Dolly- on Valentine's Day, (host) hypes the quality of replica children
-at a fashion show, Sally O'Malley (MOS) encourages age pride & displays camel-toe
-reporter (host) covers events triggered by a crash involving a clown car
-Brian Fellow's (TRM) Safari Planet- the topic is animals made into clothes
-Talkin' 'Bout 'Ginas- female celebrities speak bluntly about their genitals
February 24, 2001-Katie Holmes
*Bill Clinton (DAH) & relatives are a giddy & shameless gang of outlaws
-Dawson's Creek- Joey (host) & exchange student Mr. Peepers (CHK) have sex
-(MAR) reports as house of Drew Barrymore (host) & Tom Green (JIF) burns
-professor Roger (WIF) & his lover Virginia (RAD) creep out (JIF) & (host)
-Jarret's (JIF) Room- Billy Joel lyrics help Daniel (CHP) pursue (host)
-(CHP) directs actress (host) to grab actor's (WIF) crotch intensively
-Passive-Aggressive Pam (ANG) makes backhanded compliments towards co-workers
-at the end of their singles' cruise, (CHP) & (MAR) settle for each other
March 10, 2001-Conan O’Brien
*unlike workaholic Dick Cheney, George W. Bush (WIF) has no worries
-underage Sully (JIF) manages to buy booze for Denise (RAD), (host) & Donny Bartolotti (Ben Affleck)
-catchphrase betrays secret identity of Moleculo, The Molecular Man (host)
-Right Said Fred (host) & other one-hit wonders give Napster testimonies
-(HOS) is distressed to learn that he lost his taint in a car accident
-during a concert, Deandra Wells (ANG) barely avoids a mutiny by her band
-Marc Rich (CHK) can afford to be against a tax cut because he doesn't pay
-SportsCentury- black opponents end career of boxing pioneer (host)
March 17, 2001-Julia Stiles
*Martha Stewart (ANG) gives tips for making St. Patrick's Day classy
-Wake Up Wakefield!- Megan (MAR) & Sheldon (RAD) emcee middle school show
-(host) gives impractical postal worker Jackie (MAR) a taste of her own medicine
-in the 1920s, movie director Suel Forrester (CHK) baffles his cast & crew
-immigrant janitor Beppi (RAD) has more struggles than office workers (ANG) & (MAR)
-lily-white (host) performs cheerleader moves at Apollo Theater amateur night
-Willy Sluggs (JEM) plugs magic tricks in lame self-produced infomercial
-Der Lacheln Beherrscht- German "smile masters" populate scary kids show
April 7, 2001-Alec Baldwin
*George W. Bush's (WIF) solo negotiation effort produced a bad Chinese deal
-Lynn (RAD) & Margaret Jo (ANG) enjoy Pete Schweddy's (host) wiener
-lone Marine (host) tries to rally spy plane crew to attack China
-Inside The Actors Studio- Charles Nelson Reilly (host) is admired
-Robert Goulet (WIF) & relatives (CHP) (host) (ANG) create bad theater
-Tom Daschle (CHK) & Dick Gephardt (DAH) try too hard at a press conference
-Lasting Impressions- make your photo classy by placing it into a brandy snifter
April 14, 2001-Renee Zellweger
*at H&R Block, Marty (WIF) & Bobbi (ANG) entertain last-minute filers with tax medley
-Jonathan Lipnicki's (HOS) growth spurt complicates Jerry Maguire II shoot
-Hardball- Chris Matthews (DAH) shamelessly criticizes Paul Begala (CHK)
-A Wedding Story- desperate bride-to-be (host) approves her KISS-themed marriage
-inept romantic's (CHK) TV theme song CDs don't get his date (host) in the mood
-irresponsible Dr. Beaman (WIF) scares two pairs of expectant parents
-Classical Music Classics have been "improved" by the addition of lyrics
May 5, 2001-Pierce Brosnan
*George W. Bush (WIF) sympathizes with his daughter Jenna (Julia Stiles)
-Just Funnin'- Gemini's Twin (ANG) & (MAR) welcomes former members (Destiny’s Child)
-The Weakest Link- origin of Anne Robinson's (RAD) nastiness is revealed
-at Jeffrey's, style-challenged customers are made to feel inferior by (JIF) & (host)
-interviewee (host) is put off by (WIF)'s brutal treatment of employees
-The West Wing- episode content is influenced by Aaron Sorkin's drug use
-Bravery & Unity- WWII soldiers' combat memories involve old stereotypes
-casino daycare center treats kids to a Vegas-style floor show
May 12, 2001-Lara Flynn Boyle
*Dick Cheney's (DAH) economy of energy spending exemplifies efficiency
-(CHP) coughs repeatedly for hernia test administered by (WIF), (host) & (RAD)
-Kyle (CHK) & Sean (CHP) DeMarco wear '80s hair while auditioning for Bon Jovi [real]
-host makes an appeal on behalf of the Save The Starving Actresses Foundation
-Premiere Playhouse- town elders welcome (host)'s Scarlet Letters B & J
-old-fashioned Moulin Rouge pairs 1890s setting with 1970s music
-MSNBC Investigates- teen boy’s (CHK) Golden Girls copycat syndrome is worrisome
-Wake Up Wakefield!- phys ed teacher (host) prepares Sheldon (RAD) for the prom
-Bloater brothers (JIF) & (CHP) overextend themselves while flirting with barmaid (host)
May 19, 2001-Christopher Walken
*despite marital woes & a broken penis, Rudy Giuliani (DAH) is doing OK
-charmed janitor (host) imagines himself & Mango (CHK) in famous screen roles
-Hardball- Chris Matthews (DAH) likes Bob Barr's (CHP) crazy energy scheme
-a lost brooch provides The Continental (host) with another chance to arouse
-(ANG) learns that Dr. Walter (host) was once a lover of Roger (WIF) & Virginia (RAD)
-(host)'s personal questions dominate centaur's (CHP) job interview
-(WIF)'s aggressiveness stems from the badger that crawled up his butt
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