September 24, 1977-Steve Martin
*Bert Lance (JOB) uses his National Express card to get recognized
-Czechs Georg (host) & Yortuk (DAA) Festrunk flirt with (JAC) & (GIR)
-Mike McMack, Defense Lawyer (host) hits on (GIR) after cross-examination
-Trinity 3000 computer helps (DAA) act as priest & travel agent for (GAM)
-Great Moments In Rock & Roll- (LAN) is Roy Orbison's (JOB) "Pretty Woman"
-Franken & Davis Show- competition in Mr. U.S.A. Pageant emceed by Anita Bryant (JAC)
October 8, 1977-Madeline Kahn
*pie-thrower (JOB) attacks Lee Harry Oswald (BIM) a la Jack Ruby
-Bad Opera- (host) suffers vocal lock during Die Goldenklang performance
-Bianca Jagger (host) talks with "close personal friends" at dinner table
-(host) sings "Silver Balls & Golden Pins" during (BIM)'s bowling sermon
-(JOB) & blind African-American (GAM) compete to get into law school
-(LAN) tries to figure out what (GIR)'s Pink Box feminine product is
-(DAA) dubs a Hercules (JOB) movie into English by doing all the voices
-(GIR) & (host) tell each other secrets while waiting for a man to call
October 15, 1977-Hugh Hefner
*Playboy model (LAN) poorly recites some Playboy Party Jokes
-spaceships of Planet Of The Men & Planet Of The Women use sexual weapons
-vigilante X-Police (BIM) & (DAA) terrorize pot smokers (JOB) & (JAC)
-Jimmy Carter (DAA) interrupts circular bed sex research of host & (JAC)
-Listening To Great Music- JOB on visions provoked by "Ride Of The Valkyries"
-Sex In Cinema- love scene actors obey message but not intent of Hays Code
-3 R's- catatonic Colleen's (GIR) father (JOB) seeks damages from educators
-host introduces The Playboy Philosophy to Socrates (JOB) & Plato (GAM)
-eulogist (BIM) cheers mourners by performing magic tricks during funeral
-the Farbers (JOB) (GIR) run into host while spending an evening at the Playboy Club
October 29, 1977-Charles Grodin
*having missed dress rehearsal, host is surprised to find that SNL is live
-neighbors (BIM) & (GIR) investigate Coneheads' (DAA) (JAC) (LAN) odd Halloween treats
-Consumer Probe- Irwin Mainway (DAA) promotes some unsafe Halloween costumes
-Samurai Dry Cleaners- Futaba's (JOB) antics cause host to break character
-host's unpreparedness ruins sketch about trick-or-treating Killer Bees
-young girl Judy Miller (GIR) pretends to star in her own television show
-The Professional School of Football survey can make you a pro athlete
-Hire the Incompetent- host speaks on behalf of incompetence
November 12, 1977-Ray Charles
*Don Corleone (JOB) doesn't want to see any more Godfather on television
-host & Ella Fitzgerald (GAM) demonstrate Mamorex's sound reproduction
-Howdy Doody's widow (GIR) & sister (LAN) struggle to cope with his death
-Tomorrow- during interview, host audibly analyzes Tom Snyder (DAA)
-The Young Caucasians sing a whitebread version of "What'd I Say" for host
-the Evelyn Woodski slow reading course lets you enjoy reading again
-attempt by (DAA) & (GAM) to burglarize host is foiled by blackout
November 19, 1977-Buck Henry
*the Anyone Can Host Contest finalists meet some of the cast & host
-Samurai Psychiatrist- Futaba (JOB) helps Mr. Dantley (host) with parental issues
-director Brian Whitney (BIM) has actor Howard (host) abuse a stunt baby
-the AMOA ensures that motel bathrooms are "sanitized for your protection"
-(GIR)'s train ride to Kiev involves yesterday-today-tomorrow confusion
-Mr. Mike's Rickey Rat Club- host & Ratketeers have Anything Bad Can Happen Day
-Franken & Davis Show- the duo narrate a montage of their history & when Jackie Onassis (GIR) saved Tom’s life
December 10, 1977-Mary Kay Place
*host & castmembers are motivated to do SNL's peppiest show ever
-More Insects To Worry About- (JOB) on lens beetles & funny ants
-followers of Total Womanhood system are submissive towards husbands
-Married in a Minute!- everything goes right for young women new to NYC
-Bad Musical- the story of Dutch microscope pioneer Leeuwenhoek (JOB)
-the Farbers (JOB) (GIR) explains Hanukkah's origins to neighbors (BIM) & (host)
December 17, 1977-Miskel Spillman
*JOB ushered Anyone Can Host winner into SNL's drug culture by giving her a joint
-(LAN) says the self-conscious & the extremely obnoxious should go on dates
-JAC narrates a variation of The Gift Of The Magi acted by (JOB) & (GIR)
-Sartresky (DAA) & Hutch (JOB)- philosopher cops handle hostage situation
-Franken & Davis Show- Al sings a tribute to his parents [real] then gets mad at them
-E. Buzz Miller's (DAA) Art Classics- paintings of naked broads on display
-college student (JOB) introduces elderly girlfriend (host) to his parents
-drunk department store Santa (BIM) enjoys rejecting girl's (GIR) wish list
-LAN sings Madame Butterfly while Mr. Mike makes a Soiled Kimono
January 21, 1978-Steve Martin
*Jimmy Carter's (DAA) State Of The Union address bores Congressmen
-ranger (host) overlooks obvious clues pointing to (JOB) as Bigfoot
-Georg (host) & Yortuk (DAA) Festrunk meet their Croatian computer dates (JAC) & (LAN)
-Body Floss is the Swedish way to make hygiene efficient & fun
-Family Feud- Coneheads (DAA) (JAC) (LAN) score despite unconventional answers
-What If?- possible simulation involves Napoleon (JOB) with a B-52
January 28, 1978-Robert Klein
*Mr. Mike & Tina Turner (GAM) join to perform "Proud Mary"
-Pete Dionasopolis' (JOB) Olympia Cafe features a three-option menu
-X-Police (BIM) & (DAA) terrorize an intimate couple (host) & (LAN)
-at a ski lodge, Nick Winters (BIM) sings & Jimmy Joe Red Sky (DAA) reports
-KLOG deejay (DAA) plugs album of nerds Todd (BIM), Lisa (GIR) & Spaz (host)
-Frogs Look At Film- Jerry Lewis (host) stars in The Nutty Air Traffic Controller
-Rhonda Weiss (GIR) & Barbara (JAC) talk & smoke some dope
February 18, 1978-Chevy Chase
*Gerald Ford (CHC) talks geography while confusing Suez & Panama Canals
-the Moth Masher compresses & wraps to prepare insects for your wallet
-(CHC) & (GIR) evaluate their performance during post-sex discussion
-Jack (DAA) & Bobby (BIM) Kennedy disrupt Martin Luther King, Jr. (GAM)
-customs trainee (CHC) inspects luggage of drug smugglers (JOB) & (LAN)
-Sermonette- Church of Confusion holy man (CHC) tells a rambling story
-at a checkpoint during WWII, GIs use USA culture quiz to expose Nazis
-CHC interrupts LAN, GIR & JAC during a Victorian sketch as they shift for a good ending
February 25, 1978-O.J. Simpson
*GIR answers "What happens when SNL is out of show-opening ideas?"
-Samurai Night Fever- Futaba (JOB) & his brother (host) go disco dancing
-Great Moments In Sports- Babe Ruth's (JOB) broken promise to (GAM) produces karma
-the Mohawk Master clippers help maintain your punk hairdo
-The Raid On Nicosia- NBC's all-star Big Event is based on recent actions
-host uses voodoo to keep Walter Payton from breaking his rushing record
-Franken & Davis Show- Al's brain tumor hurts his performance so Tom requests audience support
-Mandingo II- hot passion between slaves & whites breaks boundaries
-E. Buzz Miller's (DAA) Animal Kingdom- film footage shows mating wildlife
-Celebrity Battle Of The Sexes & Races - black men easily beat white women
March 11, 1978-Art Garfunkel
*Modern Crimes- (DAA) & (JOB) rob Charlie Chaplin's (GIR) grave
-Tomorrow- Tom Snyder (DAA) reveals a battered husband's (host) identity
-Miracle In Chicago- ghost of Mayor Daley (JOB) appears at an Irish pub
-stage door guard (JOB) keeps unruly fans & guests out of a Kiss concert
-Looks At Books- nerds Todd (BIM) & Lisa (GIR) talk about the fate of the class of '77
-the Looking For Mr. Goodbar playset brings sex & violence to children
March 18, 1978-Jill Clayburgh
*leprechaun-suited GAM sings "Danny Boy" while his message scrolls by
-a new waitress (host) quits her job at the Olympia Cafe
-Sybil III- therapist (host) believes (JAC), (GIR) & (LAN) are the same woman
-Bad One-Man Theater- five simultaneous portrayals in An Evening With...
-Nutrifix directly delivers instant breakfast & amphetamines
-on an airplane, (host) sees that (JOB)'s myopia has disillusioned him
-Richard Herkiman (BIM) & his wife (GIR) reunite a bickering couple (JOB) & (host) in the shower
-Prymaat (JAC) discovers Beldar (DAA) is having an affair with student driver (host)
-Celebrity Crack-Up- Tony Orlando (BIM) & others discuss their problems
March 25, 1978-Christopher Lee
*NBC wants new Grizzly Adams star JOB to change his name to Kevin Scott
-Baba Wawa (GIR) & speech therapist Henry Higgins (host) in My Fair Lady tale
-grim reaper Mr. Death (host) explains his role to little girl (LAN)
-Anwar Sadat (GAM) asks viewers what he should do following a raid
-enjoy a roto-broiled hare meal at Dell Stator's (DAA) Rabbit Hut
-vampire hunters (host) & (JOB) try to kill Richard Nixon's (DAA) memoirs
April 8, 1978-Michael Palin
*Oscar-winner Vanessa Redgrave (JAC) & others use podium as a political forum
-IRS agent (DAA) questions a priest (host) about his tax deductions
-host tries to break record for escaping from a chest during Chekhov play
-piano teacher Mr. Brighton (host) harasses Lisa (GIR) during a lesson
-Sherlock Holmes (host) investigates The Case of the Scarlet Membrane
-(BIM)'s desire to have a good time at a party bothers his wife (LAN)
-Danger Probe- a fop (host) & his servant (GAM) provoke rednecks in a bar
April 15, 1978-Michael Sarrazin
*Jimmy Carter (DAA) urges Americans to burn cash to fight inflation
-Josh Ramsey, V.D. Caseworker (host) deals with teen couple (BIM) & (LAN)
-Judy Miller (GIR) entertains herself while expressing dislike for her sister
-in the penalty box, hockey players (DAA) & (host) find common ground
-E. Buzz Miller's (DAA) Exercise World- Christy Christina (LAN) works out
-Archaeologicus- (LAN) narrates "The Treasures Of Morton Kamen"
April 22, 1978-Steve Martin
*on Don Kirshner’s Rock Concert, The Blues Brothers (JOB) & (DAA) perform "Hey Bartender"
-the Festrunks (host) (DAA) wait for a pair of foxes to arrive at their bachelor pad
-medieval barber Theodoric of York's (host) patients endure his solutions
-time stands still while (host) & (GIR) go "Dancing In The Dark"
-admitting adulterous affairs is foreplay for married couple (JAC) & (JOB)
-on their lunch break, businessmen eat like pigs at Troff 'n' Brew
-at the science fair, Todd (BIM) & Lisa (GIR) compete with Charles Knerlman (host)
-Next Week In Review- psychics (JAC) (host) (DAA) predict the news
May 13, 1978-Richard Dreyfuss
*paraquat-tainted Mexican dope is traced from farmers (JOB) & (GIR) to BIM
-Cone Encounters of the Third Kind- (host) helps Coneheads (DAA) (JAC) (LAN) trick Kuldroth (JOB)
-Sex Test- host poses multiple choice questions to assess carnal knowledge
-Nick Springs (BIM) & Unavox SL-120 entertain newlyweds at The Honeymoon Room
-lovers (host) & (LAN) argue by pointing out each other's annoying traits
-The David Susskind (BIM) Show- celebrities & their mothers talk
May 20, 1978-Buck Henry
*since you don't have Nixon (DAA) to kick around anymore, kick his book
-before the prom, parents Marshall (host) & Enid (JAC) advise Todd (BIM) & Lisa (GIR)
-Samurai TV Repairman- Mr. Dantley (host) brings his broken set to Futaba (JOB)
-(BIM) offers image-improving ideas to the Sodom chamber of commerce
-Pete (JOB) is forced to choose between Olympia Cafe employee Nico (BIM) & a guard dog
-More Insects To Worry About- (host) warns about brain-burrowing mites
-director Brian Whitney (BIM) has actor Howard (host) abuse a stunt puppy in a scene
-Bad Conceptual Art- (GIR) performs excerpt from Pavlov Video Chicken I
-Franken & Davis Show- tragedy befalls the Franken family after Tom outs himself & Al
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