September 25, 2010-Amy Poehler
*additional discoveries threaten Christine O'Donnell's (KRW) candidacy
-Bronx Beat- busty teen singer (Katy Perry) distracts kids at her gigs
-Maternity Matters- Roger Brush (FRA) offers sexism to expectant mothers
-The Lean Years- one-legged Amber (AMP) stars in a new Showtime program
-tiny hats allow fashionable Trish (AMP) to one-up jealous Sylvia (KRW)
-Actor II Actor- ANS's music question upsets Justin Timberlake [real]
-sequels to The Expendables feature actors who are available & unwatchable
October 2, 2010-Bryan Cranston
*Rahm Emanuel (ANS) & new chief of staff Pete Rouse (BOM) are polarizing
-The Miley Cyrus (VAB) Show- Johnny Depp (PAB) doesn't get to say much
-What Up With That?- Morgan Freeman & Ernest Borgnine [real] watch (KET)’s singing & dancing
-on a basketball court, Shana (KRW) simultaneously attracts & repels co-workers
-Kid Smartz- (KET) is the lone contestant to refuse emcee's (host) kisses
-zero-hit wonders (host) & (FRA) perform a song about sparkling apple juice
-fifth grader Henry (NAP) suffers his dad's (host) self-defense lessons
October 9, 2010-Jane Lynch
*Ask Gloria Allred- the attention-hungry lawyer (NAP) addresses her own awfulness
-Glee- Sue Sylvester (host) enjoys chaos Gilly (KRW) causes on singing students
-The New Boyfriend Talk Show- (ANS) interviews mom's (host) hookup (JAS)
-Secret Word- Mindy Grayson (KRW) & comedian (host) ignore game show's rules
-researching a role, Denzel Washington (JAP) works the Macy's returns desk
-The Suze Orman (KRW) Show- ex-roommate (host) is in denial about lesbianism
-Faith Hill's (host) Sunday Night Football theme extends past the kickoff
-Patrick Cox (JAS) & vestigial conjoined twin (FRA) shoot Tax Masters spot
October 23, 2010-Emma Stone
*at a rally, Harry Reid (PAB) distances himself from Barack Obama (FRA)
-Dream Home Extreme- contest winner's (host) disinterest baffles Cheryl (KRW)
-local news reporter's (BIH) made-up stories scare teen's (host) mom (KRW)
-The View-the panel considers bullies, Halloween & Lindsay Lohan (host)
-Les Jeunes De Paris- in a bistro, "Ta Douleur" inspires youth dance-off
-My Brother Knows Everything- annoyed (ANS) is little sister's (NAP) hero
-Googie Rene's (KET) Partially-Damaged Halloween Costumes are cheap but stained
October 30, 2010-Jon Hamm
*Joe Biden (JAS) thinks we should imitate Chilean miners' good attitudes
-Liberace (FRA) taints Vincent Price's (BIH) 1960 Halloween Special
-at an audition, (KRW) specifies what she is willing to do for a part
-I Didn't Ask For This- viral video victims don't like being laughed at
-Highway Cops- motorcycle-sharing (JAS) & (host) prefer gay teases to policing
-the lounge act of Darlique (KRW) & Barney (host) contains fake arguments
November 13, 2010-Scarlett Johansson
*Hu Jintao (BIH) expects to be screwed by debtor Barack Obama (FRA)
-The Millionaire Matchmaker- Patti Stanger (host) pairs a shy nerd (VAB)
-The Manuel Ortiz (FRA) Show- Latin flair punctuates a paternity controversy
-host's answers are manipulated by (BIH) & (KRW) during her Hollywood Dish interview
-St. Kat's Middle- (KET)'s broken knee exceeds his fellow teens' positive vibes
-Paula Deen's (KRW) Big Ol' Soakems collects oil from her butter-heavy recipes
-Stars Of Tomorrow- peppy tweens (host) & Laura Parsons (VAB) are adored
-Mike (FRA) & Lexi (host) praise ceramic busts' natural class at Busteria
November 20, 2010-Anne Hathaway
*The Rachel Maddow (ABE) Show- Charlie Rangel (KET) steals the spotlight
-The Miley Cyrus (VAB) Show- Katie Holmes (host) responds to queries
-on Thanksgiving, volunteer Penelope (KRW) steals attention at a soup kitchen
-crass Queen Elizabeth (FRA) & Prince Philip (BIH) intimidate Kate Middleton (host)
-The Essentials- whiny Weather Vane (FRA) was cut from The Wizard Of Oz
-elderly TV reporter Herb Welch (BIH) hits his mic but misses the story
-Horse Play- celebrity soundtrack upstages the animated horsy baseball movie
December 4, 2010-Robert DeNiro
*Julian Assange's (BIH) latest undiplomatic WikiLeaks are TMZ-style videos
-What Up With That?- host & Robin Williams [real] are interrupted by (KET)’s singing & dancing
-From The Garden- Mr. Produce's (host) impolite son (ANS) wants attention
-on the set of Little Fockers, everything but host wows Keith (BOM)
-Blizzard Man (ANS) & his mother (host) join P. Diddy [real] in the studio
-La Rivista Della Televisione- Vinny Vedecci (BIH) revisits host's famous roles
-in a bar, (host) is the guy (ANS) & (JAS) have to screw to get a drink
December 11, 2010-Paul Rudd
*Stockholm Syndrome has made Barack Obama (FRA) address GOP talking points
-Austin Vogelcheck's (host) girlfriend (VAB) is uncomfortable with family's smooches
-What's That Name?- contestants (host) & (VAB) fail to identify working tenants
-Sexually Speaking- Roger Brush's (FRA) superficial sexist advice doesn't help
-Principal Frye (JAP) gives crisis updates during a high school assembly
-unprofessional spotlight technician Jeff (JAS) spoils host's Cabaret performance
December 18, 2010-Jeff Bridges
*on Christmas Eve, Democrats dream of better headlines in the year to come
-The Miley Cyrus (VAB) Show- Nick Nolte's (host) media scandal carries over
-Larry King (FRA) Live- Jermaine Jackson (KET) & other D-listers on the finale
-Jewish version of It's A Wonderful Life was full of arguing & complaining
-Jeff'd- host admits to his good-natured pranks on fellow actors in the biz
-in the Old West, gift-wrapping pioneers (host) & (KRW) disturb shopgoers
January 8, 2011-Jim Carrey
*Michael Bloomberg (FRA) details lazy NYC workers' inept blizzard response
-Nina's (NAP) mannish rival Lily (host) is more skilled for Black Swan role
-Finding Your Power- hidden-camera footage disproves self-assertion claims
-The Worst Of Soul Train- the '70s & '80s were full of awful musical acts
-sinister Merryville animatrons (host) (TAK) (BIH) unsettle (KET)
-psychic (host) channels his previous career as a celebrity impressionist
-grubby trio (host), (FRA) & (KRW) sings to tourists about NYC's underground
January 15, 2011-Gwyneth Paltrow
*James Carville (BIH) sabotages Fox News experts' attempt at civility
-Secret Word- Mindy Grayson (KRW) & socialite (host) ignore game show's concept
-Taylor Swift (host), Jay-Z (JAP) & others perform at (VAB)'s bar mitzvah
-record executive (host) asks FCC about using "forget" in Cee Lo Green’s hit
-modern moviegoing tropes are present in Globe Theater's Shakespeare previews
-Will Smith (JAP) admits to Fresh Prince acting missteps on DVD commentary
-SportsCenter Deportes- Latin anchors adapt USA proper nouns & phrases
-Eliot Spitzer (BIH) auditions potential replacements for Kathleen Parker
January 29, 2011-Jesse Eisenberg
*Michele Bachmann's (KRW) State Of The Union response has technical gaffes
-Mr. Wizard's (BIH) World- balloon-rubbing charges up teens (host) & (NAP)
-Don't Forget The Lyrics!- contestant's (host) mistakes are Freudian slips
-Herb Welch (BIH) gets defensive after a botching college campus drug bust story
-The Essentials- Blackenstein's (KET) Bride (Nicki Minaj) is Blaxploitatiously cheeky
-Skins- corrupt druggie minors' product placements restore advertisement income
-Spa Talk- Tyla Yonders' (KRW) poo-based oils don't soothe family discourse
-El Shrinko- (ANS) & (host) claim to need to take a penis-reducing medication
February 5, 2011-Dana Carvey
*Wayne's World- Winter's Bone dominates the Oscar picks of Wayne (MIM) & Garth (DAC)
-Church Chat- Snooki (BOM) is exorcised & Justin Bieber [real] is tempting
-Celebrity Teen Crisis Center- actors poorly answer youths' calls for help
-Live With Regis (DAC) & Kelly (NAP)- Kathie Lee Gifford (KRW) drops by
-boy (ANS) competes in a preteen girl pageant coordinated by (DAC) & (KET)
-New Wave band of (FRA) & (DAC) spoils Super Bowl party at nepotist's (TAK) bar
February 12, 2011-Russell Brand
*The O'Reilly (JAS) Factor- interview wastes Barack Obama's (FRA) time
-Ultimate Vacation Giveaway- unenthusiastic winner (host) baffles Cheryl (KRW)
-medieval king's (host) abuse of the royal chef (BIH) dooms food taster (TAK)
-Livin' Single- (VAB) rejects (TAK) who can't stand guest's (host) groping
-A Spot Of Tea- tremors disrupt Pepperpots' (host), (ANS) & (BIH) sipping
-time travel to the present day confuses violent George Washington (host)
March 5, 2011-Miley Cyrus
*Duh! Winning!- Charlie Sheen (BIH) celebrates fellow deluded trainwrecks
-Our Time!- Taboo (ANS) & apl.de.ap (KET) try to distance themselves from Black Eyed Peas
-The Essentials- Hispanic stand-up (FRA) was cut from The Sound Of Music
-The Miley Cyrus (VAB) Show- Justin Bieber (host) is a male counterpart
-Les Jeunes De Paris- jealousy & "Tekitoi" inspire French teen dancing
-(KRW) & (host) sell facial cream & a rockabilly CD only as a package deal
-unhappy cruise ship performer (host) sings about old people being gross
March 12, 2011-Zach Galifianakis
*Selection Sunday- tournament brackets are revealed for World's Craziest Person
-The Talk- panelists on lame knock-off of The View have little chemistry
-Lorenzo McIntosh (KET) & his muzzled cousin (host) warn teens about prison rape
-(host) & (KRW) tell their kids the family dog died from autoerotic asphyxiation
-Celebrity Scoop- Canadian gossip show is consistently nice & well-mannered
-crossdressed captain of the Titanic (host) shamelessly takes a lifeboat spot
April 2, 2011-Elton John
*The Lawrence Welk (FRA) Show- pianist (host) wants no part of Dooneese (KRW)
-Pete Twinkle (JAS) & Greg Stink (WLF) cover 1985 women’s shot put championship
-The Knights of the Realm contemplate their response to dragon attacking London
-Queen Elizabeth (FRA) & Prince Phillip (BIH) want punk host at royal reception
-The Silver Screen- film-loving gay partners (host) & (TAK) argue & make up
-gruff gay cowboy's (host) advances are unnoticed in an Old West saloon
April 9, 2011-Helen Mirren
*Barack Obama (FRA) lists compromises made to avoid a government shutdown
-Mort Mort Feingold (ANS) prepares income tax returns for various celebrities
-Fox & Friends- misinformed claims support anti-Obama attitudes of the channel
-Mary Shelley's (host) landlord Frank Stein (FRA) inspired her novel's monster
-The Best Of Both Worlds- Hugh Jackman (ANS) greets celebrities with two sides
-The Roosevelts- another historically-inaccurate miniseries airs on Reelz Channel
-retiring strip club deejay Tommy (JAS) introduces unsexy female dancers
May 7, 2011-Tina Fey
*the final wishes in Osama Bin Laden's (FRA) video will won't be fulfilled
-Sarah Palin (TIF) & Donald Trump (DAH) debate undeclared GOP candidates
-Ariel (TIF) & sea creatures under the sea react to Osama Bin Laden's corpse
-natural childbirth video of (BIH) & (MAR) creeps out expectant couples
-at a sleepover, Bedelia (NAP) prefers her mom's (host) company more than her peers
-Googie Rene's (KET) Slightly-Damaged Prom Wear Barn offers soiled formalwear
May 14, 2011-Ed Helms
*The Situation Room- with Osama Bin Laden dead, cocky Barack Obama (FRA) plays stand-up comic
-What Up With That?- Lindsey Buckingham & Paul Simon [real] visit during (KET)’s singing & dancing
-"Wild World" evokes family secrets of reminiscers (host) (BIH) (ANS) (JAS)
-in 1941 Hollywood, bad actor One-Take Tony's (ANS) nickname is a contradiction
-Ann-Margret (KRW) tries to throw away a wad of paper into a trashcan
May 21, 2011-Justin Timberlake
*in jail, (KET) & (JAP) discuss the Euro zone with Dominique Strauss-Kahn (TAK)
-singing & dancing mascot (host) & co-worker (Lady Gaga) battle tea bag (KRW)
-old & senile Herb Welch (BIH) fails to report on a junior high gas leak story
-What's That Name?- unlike host, Lady Gaga [real] remembers the little people
-Merryville animatrons (host) (TAK) (BIH) steal (NAP) from her boyfriend (JAS)
-Secret Word- Mindy Grayson (KRW) & magician (host) don't help contestants
-The Barry Gibb (JIF) Talk Show- debt discussion leads to panic attack
No comments:
Post a Comment